Going Nowhere Faster
by Forsythia Lux
Summary: Due to Dominic's painkiller addiction, Anemone's life has spiraled out of control. In an attempt to recover her now stolen youth, she poses as an average teen, only to find herself torn into the underground reffing world. [Dominic X Anemone]
1. Can't Get There From Here

_ Edited (1/3/06) Thanks so much for the support! Means the world_

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Eureka SeveN, or any other copyrighted things I mentioned.

Title: Going Nowhere Faster

Rating: T

Pairing: Anemone X Dominic

_I dedicate this fic to all the skateboarders who are eagerly waiting for Marty Mcfly's hoverboard to become reality._

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_**Chapter One: ****Can't Get There from Here**_

-

Stepping into the kitchen; barefoot, I involuntarily shudder as my warm feet meet the cold, linoleum floor. Eying the hot cup of coffee in Dominic's hand, I pray that it isn't the instant kind. "Good morning, Anemone. I made you breakfast," Dominic states, while placing the newspaper he'd been reading down; revealing his tired, slate eyes. Seating myself at the table, I smile, as if Dominic's wretched, though well intentioned, cooking appears appetizing. "_Merci_," I respond, while digging my fork into the rubbery omelet.

Waiting a few moments, Dominic eventually goes back to reading the paper, and I take this opportunity to lean down below the table and signal Gulliver, my obese chinchilla-esque pet. Waddling towards me, Gulliver plops down just below my feet, and I artfully slide the meal off my plate onto the floor. While this daily routine unfolds, Dominic remains oblivious, perhaps voluntarily, as he swallows two pills with his coffee.

"Well, I'm done," I quip cheerfully, disregarding the coffee he'd 'brewed' for me. "I'm going to go study," I imply, as if I honestly plan on taking the High School Equivalence Exam. Dominic had been the one to bring it up, due to my genuine interest in the College pamphlets that are addressed to him in the mail. There's just something about the glossy photos of well manicured campuses, gleaming young students, and wise professors that intrigues me.

"You'll do well. I have confidence in you," Dominic encourages; his lips forming a warm smile. Apparently he's more interested in this test than I am; which is making gathering the heart to tell him the truth even more nerve-wrecking.

Getting up from the table, I bring my plate and Dominic's to the sink; letting the water run an extra few seconds because I find it's sound soothing. Lathering the generic dish-soap, that I swear smells like Kerosene, onto the dishes, I take a paper-towel and scrub the glass, before leaving them on the dish-rack to dry. Gazing down at the marble counter-top, I study my reflection it's polish surfaced; that of a hollow-eyed girl in desperate need of saving.

I must've been staring out into space too long, because when Dominic slipped his arms around my hips, twisting our bodies into a tight embrace; I was honestly startled. Keeping my mouth shut, I let him hold me for a few moments. Our relationship, which is occasionally physical, though mostly awkward, tends to operate on this level. We don't bother to speak to each other; which makes communication often frustrating. Perhaps that is just another obstacle of love.

"Anemone...I..." Dominic stutters, as his alabaster cheeks simultaneously redden. Gosh, why does he have to act like a smitten schoolboy most of the time? My face, now crestfallen, turns away, but Dominic lifts up my chin and closes the gap in-between our lips. Pushing my body up against the counter, he deepens the kiss; without my consent. Managing to break-free, I shove Dominic away, and he falls to the floor in a 'thump'.

Looking up, his eyes widen with hurt; and I realize it's too late to take back what I've done. "I have to go," my voice cracks, as I run out of the room. Even though Dominic never gets angered by my outbursts; the way he feels sorry for me afterwards can be just as painful.

My head, oh God, my head. The throbbing pain led me to the bathroom, where I nearly collapsed. Inevitably, I could feel the blood gushing out of my nose. In a matter of seconds, it had already dripped onto the white marble floor; leaving a bright stain of crimson. Reaching for the medicine cabinet, my hand instinctively seizes the bottle of Oxycontin, my preferred pain-killer of choice.

Wait, something is not right. The bottle, which I'd left pristinely on the top shelf, is now approximately empty; a substantial dose I would've taken note of. Placing the prescription down, I mull over the situation. Moments pass and in a violent epiphany, one name comes to mind. "Dominic..." Sighing with dejection; I dump the bottle's remaining contents into the toilet, and push down the handle.

Sadly, this wouldn't be the first time Dominic has done such a thing. Back in the days of the military, I'd occasionally spot him with a syringe; shooting up morphine. He'd easily excuse the side-effects. Bloodshot eyes; allergies. Fatigue; stress. No-one seemed to mind, or felt the slightest tinge of concern. I sure didn't. But that was then, and this is now. He's been at it for months now, faking aches and pains for stronger prescriptions. If I only had the nerve to confront Dominic about his illness.

"Anemone, are you alright?" Startled, I knock plastic bottle onto the floor; but Dominic only seems to notice the blood oozing down my chin. "I passed by and saw blood; I thought you were hurt." I really need to start shutting the bathroom door. "No, it's just a nose-bleed; I'm so prone to them," As I talk, blood seeps into my mouth; and a metallic taste lingers. "Here, let me," he offers. Taking the nearest towel; Dominic clots my nose; leaning forward so our faces are just inches apart. As I gaze into his eyes, a strange feeling overcomes me. Wrapping my arms around his waist, Dominic drops the towel as I lean my head against his chest. "Will you be alright?" I ask; while he runs his fingers through my hair. "Anemone, I...I don't know," his voice trembles. I raise my lips, but I'm at loss for words of comfort. This isn't how our lives should be. What happened to us?

"Anemone..," My eyes shoot up, and I spot Dominic leaning his body against the sink. "I can't breathe," He gasps, before collapsing into my arms.

-

"So, will he be alright?" The doctor, who wore a heavy glasses prescription, put down his clip board and sighed. "Kids today, dosing up on whatever's present in their parent's medical cabinet. In his case, enough Percocet to soothe the worst of cancer patients." I inch my chair closer, waiting for him to finish answering the question. "He'll be fine, young lady, though addiction's like his can be quite tough." I had flinched the instant the doctor called me young lady. "What about detox?" I won't let Dominic come home until he is better. I can't just stand around, and simply watch his self-destruction snowball out of control. I'm not strong enough.

"Well," the doctor paused for a moment, staring aimlessly out the window, "They have special programs for Dominic's illness, it can certainly be overcome. It will take time, but he'll get better; just you wait and see." I nod, not sure of how else to respond.

I left the hospital in a fog, simply meandering down the main road towards the nearest bus-stop. I feel so guilty. For awhile, I'd been blaming Dominic for what's become of him. But I guess he can't help it. Perhaps his addiction is just some coping mechanism. For a moment, I think back to Dominic kissing me, and how much he needs me more than I need him. Strange, because not too long ago, it was the other way around.

"Hey, are-yah alright?" a girl, maybe my age, stood adjacent to the bus stop, with a ref board under her left arm. Snorting, I shake my head, and she smiles warmly. "You look familiar, we must go to the same school, right?" Without thinking, I nod; and so begins a fine web of lies. "Well, whatever's bothering you, I hope it turns out alright." Though the street-lamps are dim, I am able to make out her cerulean eyes, and the honesty shown in them. "My boyfriend's sick," I blurt out, my voice tired and raspy. She raises an eyebrow, before placing her hand on my back in a gesture of comfort. "You're not Jordan's girlfriend, are you? I heard about his transplant, everyone's praying for a speedy recovery." I shake my head, again. "He...doesn't go to High School." The girl makes an 'oh' expression, before drifting her eyes to the ground. Just then, I feel as if I should go on. "He...he abuses, I mean, is addicted," tears swell in my eyes, and I bury my face into my fists. "I didn't mean to," She begins, but I interrupt. "He abuses pills; there, I said it!"

Following my outburst, there is a moment of silence, but the girl quickly changes the subject. "I'm about to go ref with some of my friends, since you seem so down, maybe you'd like to tag along? If you don't wan-nah come, It's alright, you seem far too cool to be wasting time with me anyway." Me, cool? I find myself laughing, almost unconsciously; and the girl turns away, with disappointment in her eyes. "I didn't mean...you see," She lifts her head, and I continue, "I think it's funny, how you said 'I look too cool' to hang with you. In reality, it can't be farther from the truth."

"So, are you coming or not?" The girl asks bluntly. "Uh, I guess," Holding out her hand, she pulls me up from the curb, and I remain still, while she begins to walk down the sidewalk. "Gosh, girl. Where-ever you plan on going; you can't get there from here." As she waits for me, I can feel something change, perhaps the wind.

"My name's Anemone." For some reason, I felt as if she should know my name. Grinning, she replies, "Can I call yah Em?" I've never been given a nick-name before. "I'd be delighted," I answer, contemplating the idea of an actual friendship. "I guess you'd like to know my name, huh?" I shrug, indifferently. To be honest, I find exchanging names ruins the romance of being acquainted strangers.

"I'm Lenzie, just Lenzie." Dropping her ref board, Lenzie gets on top of it, but not before instructing me to wrap my arms around her waist. "The site's only a few blocks, but why walk when there's trapar in the air?" Below, the ground becomes fuzzy as we pick up speed. Suddenly, I find myself reminiscing about type-END, my KLF skills; Oh, how I could ref back then.

"So, are you a fan of Gekko-State?" I casually bring up, looking for an excuse to brag about meeting them. "You mean those posers? Sure, they can ref, but the way Holland and the others dissociated themselves from reffing's roots; well, to be quite honest, it's sickening. I bet they can't tell the difference between Tony Alva and Tony the pizza guy." I laugh, as if it was expected of me.

"We're almost there," Lenzie states, stopping her board so we both can get off. As I wander through the surrounding area, the distinct smell of Chlorine lingers in the air. "Are we near a pool or something?" Disregarding my question, Lenzie takes my hand, leading me deeper into the brush. "Are you sure you know where..." I stop mid-sentence, spotting a drained swimming pool and group of refers that had congregated in.

My eyes trace the refers' movements; which shift between fluid and erratic. Their boards clash against the metal, grinding and grabbing every twist and turn. Just observing this scene can make one envy the rush they must be experiencing. And during these few moments, I find myself believing what Lenzie had told me earlier. Maybe Gekko-State does have the wrong idea; we should be honoring and embracing the influences that led to such a sport; not shunning them.

Halting her board beside me, one of the refers puts out her right hand, in a greeting. "_Kook_, welcome to the Old-School revolution." Well, I've experienced many unorthodox introductions; but none-with this much zeal.

The other's, noticing the girl's absence, descend from their boards as well; and I feel an obligation to speak. "What you were doing before, it was so..." "Real?" A taller boy interrupts. I nod, even though it wasn't my intended answer. "Our unique style, is in fact, just an adaption of the 'original' refers from back in the day. A time when boards needed four wheels and grip-decks," Lenzie continued.

"The Z-Boys," I mutter. And as if I'd spoken a secret password, their eyes all widen in astonishment. To be honest, I have a very vague description of the founders of reffing, just some sketchy information I uncovered in ancient Thrasher back-issues. But that can't stop me from pretending, now can it?

* * *

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_Trivia:_

Kook is a derogatory term used to describe individuals who pose as skateboarders or surfers.

Lenzie is a homage to real life female skater, Lyn-Z Adams.

Anemone mentions Thrasher, a Skateboarding hobby-type magazine publication. It issues the prestigious "Skater of the Year" award.

The Zephyr Team, infamously known as the The Z-Boys, (Tony Alva, Jay Adams, Stacy Peralta, etc) were the founders of modern skateboarding, making use of polyurethane wheels and the pools drained during the California drought in the 70's.

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_Please support this often forgotten pairing, and review!_


	2. Without Pain

_(Edited 4/6/07) _

Disclaimer: I do not own Eureka Seven, etc...

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_**Chapter Two – Without Pain **_

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Though Lenzie's friends were somewhat hesitant about my initiation into their so called 'street reffing' culture; during those first few days, I somehow managed to define my own style; carve out a name and image. Of course, my so called 'image' seemed to revolve around the fact that I would attempt _anything_. But I guess that was just my post-military sense of morality; or should I say 'lack' of?

"She's not gonna do it; it's practically suicide," an onlooker remarked, awestruck; while more refers gathered to witness the scene unfold. One individual even brought a camera; as if he was filming the next 'Camp Kill Yourself,' or something.

And to think, those fools worshiped the Gekko-State. Sure, Holland and co. had their moves; but I doubt they'd take reffing to the _exteme_.

Diving off a recently abandoned military tower, I jumped onto my board and managed to spin it into a perfect 540; which granted me with the ideal conditions needed to pull off a myriad of other vert feats. Reaching down for the nose of my board, I decided to Nar Jar for a few moments, but I fumbled; McTwist-ing instead. An unfortunate mistake; but still quite enjoyable.

"Who does she think she is?" I could hear a member of Lenzie's crew rant off. Apparently my 'vert' freestyle tainted their so called 'street' ref rep; excuse my alliteration. But like my typical oblivious self, I just pushed their opinions to the side and focused on landing my Bomb Drop.

As I approached the asphalt, the crowd, which seemed quite smaller from up above; erupted in a mixed roar of cheers and heckles. Ignoring their schizophrenic response, I closed my eyes and tried to balance the board; making use of my new reffing shoes. I knew I could land it, however,If only there was enough trapper...

The waves, which were much lower than usual, did provide my board with enough support, and I came crashing down.

Tightening my fists, shockwaves ran throughout my body as I slammed against the asphalt. At first, I remained on the ground limply, only to sit up in a fit of laughter. "Told-yah she was nuts," A spectator stated, and soon the crowd's numbers began to dwindle.

"Gosh, are you alright?" Running to my aid, Lenzie pulled out a handkerchief and fastened a makeshift tourniquet for the gash on my arm. "That was so fright. Bam Margera would've been proud," another member of her, or should I say our, crew added.

Sighing, I wished Dominic had been there to witness my stunt. Without any rational individuals to chastise me after such a risky move; it just didn't feel right.

Sitting down on a nearby bench, as the others dissipated into their own worlds, Lenzie came to join me. "Dominic's getting better," I casually brought up; after all, he was my boyfriend.

"Do they have-'em doing all that arts-and crafts stuff? I had a cousin go to rehab once; came back brainwashed; and with the strange talent of cutting out those little chain-link people. You know, when it looks like they're hold'n-" "Yeah, yeah; he can be needle-pointing for all I care; as long as he gets better," I interrupted, while anxiously shifting my body on the bench. Noticing my change in disposition, Lenzie abruptly changed the subject.

"So, did yah guys ever...you know," Lenzie paused, as if I knew what she'd say next. "...do _it_?" Picking at my cuticle, I took the time to muse on what she could possibly be hinting at.

"Gawd, do I have to spell in out for you?" Wait, did she mean... "In that case, S-," "I know what asked, and the answer's 'ewh'," I replied, trying to get her question quickly over with.

"Well, you guys _do _live together, I kinda can't help but won'duh," She stated; her southern drawl heavier than ever. "I won't...he wouldn't; it's complicated," Getting up from the bench, I hopped back onto my board in an attempt to put an end to our conversation.

"What if he died?" Well, isn't she an optimist. "What do you mean by that?" Pushing a strand of auburn hair behind her ear, Lenzie shrugged. "Yah know; what if he went into shock or something; wouldn't you have some regrets?"

Gosh, I never imagined girl-talk being so complicated. "I try to live in the now. I guess you can call me naïve; but when you've experienced a lot, the last thing in you're mind is gruesome thoughts, a wannabe-Nostradamus' crackpot predictions, or just plain paranoia. But like I said, this is just me." As I finished, Lenzie nodded distractedly; I could tell she was more captivated by the gap possibilities of the guardrails on the side of the road.

"Look, I'll see-you around," I spoke, taking off on my board before I could hear her response. Perhaps some things should left in the dark.

-

I awoke to find myself in Dominic's arms, my face buried against his chest. He'd been released from the hospital the previous night; however, I'd seen little improvement. While Dominic had been gone, I disposed of all the medication in our house; unfortunately, he had discovered other ways to become numb. Averting my gaze to Dominic's bare arms, I tried to ignore the scar tissue lacing them.

"Mmm...you're warm," he murmured, and I changed my focus. Entwining our fingers, Dominic pulled me closer, but I resisted. "I...I don't want to..." Though I couldn't summon the words, he seemed to understand my wishes; sitting up from bed and propping his knees against his chest.

Running a finger through his matted black hair, Dominic gazed at the opposite wall; his eyes charcoal voids. Thinking back to my conversation with Lenzie; I began to wonder if she had made a point. What if his downward spiral were to evolved into a head-first freefall?

Taking dire action, I turned towards Dominic and reach for his waistband, while pushing his body against the headboard in an urgent kiss. "Anemone..." He gasped; though I could tell the rational part of him resisted. Disregarding that fact; I tried to 'really' deepen things; except this time Dominic shoved me away in distress. "What the hell? Do you think this is some sort of game?" The corners of my mouth curled to form a smile, and I crawled back onto him. "I'm just doing what you want," I responded, bringing my lips to his ear. Sighing, Dominic wrapped his lacerated arms around me. "But is it what _you _want?" I just wanted...I..

Fresh tears ran down my face; staining my porcelain cheeks with their moisture. "Hush, Anemone. We don't have to...," Dominic eased; resting his hand at the small of my back. "I love you,"somehow uttered from my lips; and Dominic's eyes softened. "Te quiero," he purred back; and suddenly everything became clear.

"What if it hurts?" I asked, trembling, while unfastening my nightgown. "I...I don't know," he began to stutter; and I took note of his flushed completion.

Who knew I was about to make the biggest mistake of my life.

_- _

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_Trivia_

Te quiero means I love you in Spanish

540 – is a vert trick, when the board is spun 1 and a half times in the air

Nar Jar – a nosegrab (the front of the board) while during a 540

Mc'twist – hard to explain...just think of it as a really cool spinny trick

Bomb Drop – When you dive/jump off an object (usually high) and land flat

Camp Kill Yourself – Aka, CKY, the skateboarding videos with Bam Margera, not the band (that Bam's brother happens to be a member in)


	3. Tangled Up in Me

Disclaimer: I do not own Eureka Seven, etc...

_(Edited 4/9/07) _

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_**Chapter Three: Tangled Up in Me **_

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"Are you smoking?" Jerking forward, the vintage lighter fell from Dominic's grasp; and I could spot a cigarette wedged between his middle and index finger. "Sss..sorry, I guess it's a bit rude to do so in the house. I'll go outside next time," He apologized casually; as if the gesture had slipped his mind.

"Is this an old habit, or are you just experimenting with a new form of suicide?" Exhaling a fistful of smoke, Dominic flicked ash onto the marble counter, tarnishing it's surface. "Please, just give me a break. A lot is going on right now; and I'm trying my best to hold-it together." Hn, the last time I checked, chilling with a pack of Newport's isn't trying your best. Scowling my face, I left the room in a huff, only to have Dominic trail behind.

Grabbing my forearm, Dominic tried to pull me closer; the sensation of his skin against my own nigh-overwhelming. Gazing into his eyes, I recognized the same hollow expression from the previous night; the look only an act of pure, unconditional love can cure. "Why?" I cried out, my voice shrill and distorted. He didn't respond. Still holding onto my arm, our mouths collide in a bruising kiss, and I decided to let Dominic have his way. If it would help him get better, then we were doing was alright – _Right?_

As Dominic shoved me against the couch, I could feel his hands scope every couture of my body. Reaching under my shirt, his fingers crawled along the spine of my back, inevitably unhooking my bra-strap.

I wished he'd stop. But I guess you could say I brought it upon myself; If I had just gathered the courage and raised my voice, summoned the words tangled up in me, maybe it wouldn't have been happening – just maybe.

Only when he begun to slip out of his sweatpants did I realize the reality of the situation. I couldn't let him take advantage of me ..._or would I?_

Digging my nails into Dominic's back; as he winced I decided to make a break for it. "Anemone..." he began, but I was out the front door before his sentence had finished.

Aimlessly wandering through the forlorn streets of our neighborhood; it wasn't long until I crossed paths with the local high-school. A large, somewhat regal building; the mid-afternoon campus seemed abuzz with teen life. The one thing I most desperately desired.

"Hey, what's your name?" Looking up, I spotted a boy, maybe my age, sitting on a nearby bench; a ref board taking up the empty space beside him. Making eye contact; I disregarded the question; but he revealed his name to me instead. Of course, I refused to acknowledge the detail; he was just some anonymous individual, and at the time, I preferred him stay that way.

"You ref?" I asked; pointing to the board adjacent to him. Nodding, his eyes eyes lit up. "I saw you at the park the other day. What you did back there, it was cool." I shrugged, indifferent to his enthusiasm. "So, perhaps we could hang out some time?" Diffidently staring at the ground, I circled my foot in the gravel, contemplating his offer. "Perhaps," and just like that, I opened a whole new can of worms...

-

As my bare legs brushed against the leather seat, I surrendered to the thrill of infidelity. So he may have wanted me for all the wrong reasons; but wasn't that why I was cheating in the first place?

His car smelled like a cross between mint and gym shorts; but I found it's scent relieving. It didn't remind me of Old Spice; the aftershave Dominic insists on using.

"Do you mind...?" He asked; his fingers at the string of my halter-top. Smiling warmly, I nodded, and he pulled the knot loose. At least he had etiquette. Steadying my hand against the car window; in lieu of the Titanic, It felt as if we'd been going at it for hours, though logically it was probably around fifteen minutes.

"I have a class next period," he stated, before sliding off my body and putting his shirt back on. Unlocking the door, I pushed it open and stepped outside, observing my disheveled reflection in the rear-view mirror.

"See-you around," he said, while reaching out and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. I opened my mouth, but like always; I couldn't find the right words to say.

Placing my right hand against my cheek, I found myself overcome by disgust. I felt dirty, contaminated. I had to get home.

Jumping onto my ref board, I rode to Dominic's house, which is relatively five blocks from the local high school.

Shutting the front door, as I walked deeper into the house, I realized that Dominic was gone. Finding his absence somewhat relieving, I entered the bathroom, peeling off my clothes before entering the shower.

Lathering the coconut scented shampoo onto my head; an image of _him_ touching my hair came to mind. Dominic would surely know. Wasn't it obvious? I'd become a slut, a hoar. It was practically branded on me. Scrubbing my skin with a loofah, I only stopped when my completion had become a bright shade of red. I'd never be clean enough...

Opening the bathroom door; the steam quickly dissipated, and I entered the master bedroom. Reaching into the bureau drawer, I retrieved one of Dominic's undershirts, a pair socks, and my undergarments.

Slipping into the white shirt, it went down to my torso, and since I was in my own house, I felt that it adequately covered my body. Sliding on my panties, I reached to my side for the cotton socks.

Pulling my right foot into a sock, I felt something inside the footwear. Spilling the contents out onto the bed, my eyes widened as I recognized what they had stashed.

Pills. Red ones, small ones, capsules and chewable; an array of pharmaceuticals spilled across the duvet. "How could he?" I gasped, while picking up a handful of pills and tossing them across the room.

With my eyes glazed, I ran to the toilet, revisiting breakfast almost immediately. Why? Slamming the seat down, I knocked the toothbrushes and other toiletries off the counter, only to accidentally cut my hand with Dominic's razor. Watching the blood slowly drip down, for a moment I almost felt alive.

"What are you doing?" Sure enough, there stood Dominic, leaning his body against the door-frame. "Go...just leave," Covering my eyes, tears mixed with blood as he moves closer. Please, don't...

"What happened before, I didn't mean to... you know I would never..." Shoving him away, tears continued to flow steadily. "But that's just it! You almost did..." And like a blow to the heart, Dominic backed into the bedroom, only to notice the pills scattered across the room.

"You found..." I nodded; and just like that, he started to cry as well. Picking about a dozen pills, Dominic looked up at me with remorse, before jamming them into his mouth and swallowing.

I had a strange feeling I was about to get re-acquainted with the emergency room.


	4. Had I Never

Diclaimer: I do not own Eureka SeveN

A/N: Thanks for all the support! It's really awesome! PS: Shout out to Eureka Extreme Forum, and Eureka SeveN forums!

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_**Chapter Four: Had I Never**_

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"So what is he in for?" I casually asked, nodding to inpatient across the hall. Shrugging, Dominic reached for the glass of water at his bedside. "Oh, Vinny? He sniffs aerosol cans. 'Was almost kicked out just this past week - 'got into the janitorial closet and stole some disinfectant," pausing, Dominic brought the drink to his lips.

I still couldn't believe he ended up in rehab. After having his stomach pumped, the doctors thought it would be best if Dominic received 'proper' care. Due to his past history of relapse, at the time, it made sense to send him away. However; I didn't realize with Dominic in rehab, I'd be all alone. Lonely enough, that sinking into another's arms _almost_ seemed forgivable.

"Anemone?" Turning my attention back towards Dominic, an appreciative smile formed across his lips. "Your support...I wouldn't have been able to do this without you," As he finished, my stomach simultaneously churned. If only Dominic knew the truth.

"I have to go," I inadvertently blurted, but he sat up in protest. "But you just got here," as he grabbed my arm, the shame instantly returned. "Please, just stay a bit longer," Dominic urged; and I could make out a desperation in his eyes I never wished to witness.

"Perhaps we could be alone?" he implied, and I found myself nodding in agreement; even though Dominic's intimate touch was the last thing I wanted to feel. "I know the perfect place." Exactly what I did not want to hear.

As he stepped out of bed and directly under a florescent light , I finally noticed the toll Dominic's illness had upon his body. His skin was nearly translucent, while his granite eyes were cloudy and hollow.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, while I continued my blatant staring. "No, I'm just...thinking." I lied, but my poker face displayed otherwise. The truth is, something is _always_ wrong.

-

Surprise-surprise, the 'perfect place' is an unlit storage room.

Pinning me to a corner, Dominic removed his sweatshirt and began to run his fingers up the back of my blouse. Bringing my mouth against his own, I decided to deepen our kiss before he had the chance.

This charade continued for a few moments, but as Dominic began to untie the cord to his flannel pajama pants, I pulled away. "We're not actually going to ... you know here; are we?" Flashing me an elusive grin, he reached for my belt and proceeds to unbuckle it. As if it weren't already obvious, I took that as a 'yes'.

There was an awkward silence as we both undressed; but with the situation considered, it's quite understandable. "Should we lie down?" Shrugging, I let Dominic take the initiative, and he passionately thrust me against the wall.

His lips brushed the nape of my neck; looking up, his ash grey eyes focused on my own amethyst orbs. As if I were gazing into his soul, I somehow could tell he was in distress.

"I can't..." He gasped unexpectedly, before wrapping his arms around my shoulders. Perhaps he'd finally realized that using guilt as a means of pressuring me into having relations is wrong.

"I'm sorry about being so pathetic." Burring his face against my bare collarbone, I could feel my skin moisten as tears swelled in his eyes. "You're not pathetic; everyone has their doubts, trust me, I understand."

Straightening his posture, Dominic shook his head and lightly sniffled. "No, I mean, I _physically_ can't." - Oh...

As my eyes widened, Dominic took a step back. "The withdrawal, it's...I..." Even in the dark, I could make out the teardrops staining his cheeks. "We don't have to..." "No!" he interrupted, before aggressively shoving me to the ground.

Staring up at him in disbelief, signs of remorse were visibly formed across his face. "Wait, Anemone, I never... I.." Biting my lip, I knew that if I mentioned the bruise swelling on my wrist Dominic would be driven further tho the edge; well, if he wasn't already there.

"You're right Dominic, _I never_. Had I never... if we'd never; it's time to give up." Blinking, he seemed somewhat shocked; because for once in our relationship, I said what needed to be said. "You really – you really feel that way?" Possibly, but I wasn't inclined to reveal my innermost thoughts.

"Actually, I changed my mind," As if I lifted a weight from his shoulders, Dominic breathed a sigh of relief, "You _are_ pathetic." How's that for speaking my mind?

-

"How'd that happen?" Tenderly taking my wrist, _he _carefully examined the days old bruise. Quickly pulling my arm away, I brought down the sleeve of my jacket, the jacket he'd given me when our relationship passed two months, and hid the yellow and black marking.

"Did someone do that to you?" Could he tell? Shrugging, I flashed him one of my million dollar smiles. "Of course not, I fell off my ref board; you know me and my klutzy moves." "You have to be more careful," _he _chastised, though like a parent, I knew he meant it for my own good.

In the distance, I could hear the sound of a bell. Picking his school-books up from the bench, _he_ leaned in and kissed me goodbye before heading to his next class.

"Are you free this period?" It was one of his friends. Making eye contact, I didn't respond. "Yeah, aren't we all?" He replied, as if I had answered his question.

"There's a dealer by the dock, since I'm short on cash, wanna pitch in for a dime-bag?" I should have said no, but like most of the time, that option was unthinkable.

-

It was only one joint, but my mind felt loose, as if all my mental constraints had unraveled.

"I don't love him," was the first of my word vomit. His friend didn't ask who; I guess it was more obvious than I'd first thought. "He loves me, though. That's why he and I..." I couldn't continue, so I opted for a distraction; laughter.

"You're insane," he stated, though it sounded as if it were a compliment. "Aren't we all?"


	5. High on Air

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Eureka SeveN, nor do I own any other copyrighted things I mentioned.

Thanks for all the support! It means ALOT!

* * *

_**Chapter Five: High on Air**_

-

"Is that Absolute?" With a smirk on his face, he nodded. "Absolutely." Pouring himself a drink, the jock then passed me the vodka bottle, his fingerprints smeared on its dewy surface.

"Shouldn't you dilute it first?" Pouring the liquor straight into my glass, I took advantage of my temporarily lowered moral standards and swiftly consumed the shot. "I have a high tolerance." Ok, that was a total lie, but it wasn't like I was planning on getting inebriated; just numb. Totally disconnected, I bet it was the feeling that attracted Dominic to drugs in the first place.

In my back pocket, I could feel my phone vibrate, but I dared not to answer it. "Ignoring someone?" Looking up at the jock, I smiled. "Perhaps..." Intrigued, the jock casually reached forward and flicked one of my large, silver hoop earrings. "In that case, maybe we could...get to know one another?"

I didn't reply, I couldn't. Taking a step back, I reached for my phone and pressed the first number on speed dial.

"Anemone, is that you?" When I heard his voice, I almost shut the phone, however, I knew I had to speak with him, it was for my own good. "I went to the party..." I heard a faint sigh on the other end. "Are you there now?" Pausing, I couldn't bring myself to respond. "Want me to come pick you up?" I just wanted... I...

"Anemone?" Dropping my phone out of surprise, I found myself face to face with Lenzie, and her entourage of reffing friends. "Where have'yah been girl? I haven't seen you at any reff spots in weeks!" Since I'd been embroiled in so many situations, I found it hard to make time for reffing. "Busy, that's all." Narrowing her eyes, Lenzie hinted at knowing more; but like a good friend, she let me off the hook.

"Well, I guess it's your lucky day, because we're about to hit a reffing spot now." Eying my ref board in the corner, I contemplated telling them I'd left it at home. "I...I'll go." "Great!" Lenzie chipped, while reaching for my arm and pulling me further into the depths of the party.

-

Like any abnormal evening, and I found myself downtown on a high-rise's rooftop.

"That's 'Transworld Reffing', Lenzie's friend pointed out. Adjusting her lenses' focus, the photographer leaned against the rooftop ledge as she photographed various reffers in the cityscape below. "This month, she's a doing a feature on street reff; it's about-damn time we got recognition."

Hopping on my board, I flew past the apparently infamous photographer, without a care in the world. Diving into the twilight abyss, with my back hand I reached for the tail of my board and Benihana-ed onto a nearby building's ledge; only to realize a flash had gone off.

Grinning, I decided to exploit the situation and 50-50 grinded the rest of the ledge, only to grab the front of my board and Rocket Air off the edge. Of course, there was another flash, but by then, I didn't mind. I finally had found my true calling.

-

'Street Reffers Put Gekko State to Shame', read the headline. Just below, the cover shot was of me Airwalk-ing between two ledges. A dopey, carefree smile was plastered on my lips; comparable to the one I wore when I learned I had made the magazine.

"Do you think you'll get a sponsorship?" Dominic asked, while skimming through the glossy pages of Transworld Reffing. "Maybe," I replied, even though I'd already received a handful of offers.

"Oh, I almost forgot; Renton Thurston visited." Though, not completely surprised, I found myself raising an eyebrow. "He did?" Nodding, Dominic closed the magazine. "He seemed...confused; as if he didn't know how to react." I couldn't blame him; I was still awkward around the subject, myself.

"How's Eureka?" I skillfully changed the topic. "He didn't really say; just that they're all adjusting pretty well to life in Belleforest." I always knew they'd make a happy family.

"Anemone..." With his hands on my hip, Dominic's lips brushed the back of my neck. "I'm really proud of you..." Yeah, I'm _sure_ he was. Rolling my eyes, I crossed my arms and stepped forward, out of his embrace. "What's wrong with you? Why can't you be more like J-," Catching my blunder, I stopped in mid-sentence. "No, go on, more like whom?" Definitely not my _other_ boyfriend...

"Have you been cheating on me?" Dominic asked, his voice quivering. I couldn't bring myself to respond. Gazing into his granite eyes, they'd already begun to glaze by the time I reached out for his shoulder. Jerking back, Dominic turned away in disgust. "Don't touch me!"

Disregarding his request, I put my lips against his own, and he kissed back. Unbuttoning my top, I crawled onto his body, placing my hands at the elastic of his pants. As if I'd shut off my brain, from then on, I let things just... happen. Too bad I couldn't erase consequences...

* * *

- 

_**Trivia:**_

Benihana (difficult to describe, 'cause there's a few version of it) When a skater holds the tail (back) of the board while taking their back foot off the board.

50-50 Grind : When the whole board is used in a grind

Rocket Air: When you grab the front of the board with both your hands and move your feet to the back of the board.

Airwalk: When you hold the nose of the board with your front hand while splitting your legs as if you're walking.

Transworld is a skateboard magazine publication (they also make other Extreme Sports magazines) Let's hope they'll be around for the awesome extreme sports that'll come out in the future.


	6. Seventeen is just a Test

* * *

_Chapter 6 - Seventeen is Just a Test_

_- _

* * *

- 

We'd made a silent truce. Dominic would avoid pills, and I'd steer clear of... Swallowing air, I felt the cell phone vibrating in my pocket.

I knew there were kinder ways to call it off with someone, but at the time, I was more concerned about my fragile heart; compared to the ones I'd been breaking.

Placing my head on Dominic's lap, I entwined our fingers and waited for the physical contact to rosy his pale cheeks.

"It's been 3 ½ months..." Running his hand though my strawberry hair, Dominic continued. "My Narcotics Anonymous sponsor says I've improved." Well, if calling his sponsor only _twice_ a day to whine about how much he craved drugs, counted as an improvement.

"Are you hungry? I can order out dinner, if you'd like." Declining my offer, Dominic reached into his pocket and retrieved a cigarette; the only thing he seemed to have an appetite for. Withdrawal had taken away his ability to eat, sleep; function in general.

Leaning down as if he were to kiss me, Dominic paused just above my lips. "Have you been drinking?" I couldn't answer his question. "Anemone, you're on the way to your _own_ twelve step program. Listen, please stop."

His sincere, yet somewhat hypocritical, plea struck a chord. "Yeah, like you should be talking. At least I'm not the one on Methadone." I knew it was wrong to snap at Dominic; but like him, I couldn't admit to my addiction. Denial is much easier than the truth.

Sitting up, I leaned forward and gazed into Dominic's cloudy, grey eyes. He was about to cry. "I..." Interrupting my apology, Dominic crashed his mouth against my own. I didn't kiss back. Pulling away, he seemed to know the cause of my distress.

"It's _him_, isn't it?" I was never good at masking my feelings. I was mad at Dominic. How could he expect me to stop drinking, when being in the same room with him would make me want to down the strongest Proof available?

On the contrary, when I was with '_him', _consuming alcohol was unthinkable. With _him_, I was just an average teenage girl, no giant robots, saving the world; _addictions_.

"I...love you!" My somewhat blunt declaration caught Dominic off-guard; and a confused expression formed across his face.

"I just wanted to be normal, I never meant to hurt you." Wrapping his thin arms around me, Dominic pulled me into a tight embrace. "Maybe we can be normal together." Maybe I should have told him it's a bad idea.

-

"Wow, you dumped your boyfriend for an underclassmen? Must've been some breakup." Disregarding the girl's comment, I took Dominic's hand and maneuvered him through the house party's chaos.

"Don't worry, with the right clothes, you can probably pull off 18." Narrowing his eyes, Dominic didn't seem to appreciate my humor.

Making our way into the kitchen, Dominic reached for a cup of cola, before I had a chance to warn him. Taking a sip, he winced and spit the drink back into his cup.

"Ewh, what's in this, Drano?" Taking the drink from his hand, I tossed it in the sink. "It's mixed with rum." If he hadn't spit in it, I would've consumed the cola.

"Anemone, we _need _to go." Dominic stated, while squeezing my hand urgently.

"What? But we just..." That's when I saw it. A boy reaching for a prescription bottle on the coffee table. Swiftly opening it's child-safety cap, he spilled the bottle's contents onto the table; pain killers.

How could I have been so stupid? It was a high school party; of course there would be drugs.

Handing him my cell phone, I advised Dominic to call his sponsor before he did something he'd regret.

-

Siting in the backseat of Dominic's car, I listened to him complain to his sponsor via cell phone in the front.

"I keep thinking, just one pill, but then..." I wanted to punch him. We could never be normal; not when he had the compulsion to abuse pills.

Eventually Dominic ended the conversation with his sponsor, and the car filled with an unease of silence. I had just one question to ask.

"Why did you start?" Unnerved, Dominic clenched the leather seat. A minute or so passed, and just when I though he wasn't going to respond, Dominic opened his mouth.

"You kicked me." Dominic paused and observed my bewildered expression. "It was one of your usual fits. Of course, I served as the recipient of your outrage. You kicked me against the wall, injuring my back. I took some pain killers; they made the back-ache go away, among other things."

I felt awful. The whole time I'd been blaming Dominic for his drug problem, when in reality, I was the catalyst for his addiction in the first place. As my eyes swelled with tears, Dominic climbed into the backseat to comfort me.

"Look you didn't make me like this. I stopped using pain killers after my back healed. But then Dewey's plans, the death and destruction I'd partake in everyday; I started to crave the numbness I received from the pills. With everything else going on at the time, I didn't consider my actions harmful. Towards the end, I started stealing syringes of morphine from the medical supply room. I used to shoot up in Dewey's office."

"How did he not find out?" Bowing his head, Dominic continued. "Actually, Dewey knew. I nearly OD'd in his office. He found me passed out on the floor. He...he wanted me to stop. He_ cared_."

Burying my face into his chest, I let my tears stain his t-shirt. "Can we go home?" I quietly asked. "Of course," Dominic replied, while softly stroking my hair.

* * *

-

- The chapter title is a line in a Red Jumpsuit Apparatus song

- The painkillers Dominic abuses derive from Opiods, which are narcotics, which explains why he's in Narcotics Anonymous.


End file.
